Helping Toddlers Learn Emotional Regulation: Creating a Cozy Calm Down Corner That Actually Works

We’ve all been there — your toddler is melting down because you gave them the wrong color cup, or because it’s time to leave the park, or simply because their socks feel “funny.” Emotional regulation is one of the biggest challenges of early childhood (and honestly, even for us adults).

But here’s the thing: toddlers aren’t misbehaving — they’re communicating. They just don’t have the words or the skills yet to manage big emotions in healthy ways. That’s where emotional regulation comes in.

What Is Emotional Regulation?

Emotional regulation is the ability to understand, express, and manage feelings in healthy ways. It’s not about never having big feelings — it’s about learning what to do with them.

When we help toddlers regulate, we’re teaching them that all feelings are okay — but not all behaviors are. A calm down corner gives them a safe place to feel, breathe, and reset without punishment or shame.

⸻

How to Create a Cozy Calm Down Corner

You don’t need a fancy setup or a Pinterest-perfect space. What matters most is that your child feels safe and comforted there. Here’s how to make it work:

1. Pick a Peaceful Spot

Choose a quiet corner of your home — maybe near their play area or bedroom. It should feel cozy and private but not isolated. Add soft lighting, a rug or blanket, and a few plush pillows.

2. Add Comforting Sensory Items

Sensory tools help children self-soothe by giving their bodies something gentle to focus on. Try including:

• A soft stuffed animal or weighted plushie

• A small blanket or fidget pillow

• A glitter jar or sensory bottle they can shake and watch settle

• Calm-down sensory toys like pop-its, stretchy noodles, or squishy stress balls

3. Include Emotion Tools

Visuals help toddlers name their feelings, which is the first step toward regulation. You might add:

• A feelings chart (with faces and names of emotions)

• A mirror so they can see and identify expressions

• A calming toolkit — simple cards that show what to do when you’re mad, sad, or scared (like “take a deep breath” or “give yourself a hug”)

4. Practice When They’re Calm

The calm down corner isn’t just for meltdowns. Spend time there when your child is already calm — read a book, cuddle, or practice breathing together. This builds positive associations so they’ll want to use it when they’re upset later.

⸻

Toy Ideas for Your Calm Down Corner

If you’re looking for toy suggestions that help support emotional regulation, here are a few tried-and-true favorites:

• Weighted stuffed animals – add comfort and grounding pressure

• Liquid motion timers – mesmerizing and soothing to watch

• Pop tubes or sensory coils – great for releasing tension

• Fidget spinners or cubes – help redirect restless energy

• Calm-down coloring books – for quiet, mindful focus

• Books about feelings – like The Color Monster or In My Heart

These items aren’t just “toys” — they’re tools to help your child learn that emotions aren’t scary, they’re just signals.

⸻

Want to Go Deeper Into Emotional Regulation? 🎧

If you found this helpful, you’ll love my latest podcast episode — all about how to teach emotional regulation in simple, age-appropriate ways (without power struggles or guilt).

I share practical examples, mindset shifts, and even some stories from real toddler moments that will make you feel seen and encouraged.

👉 Listen to the episode on “The Toddler Feelings Podcast” — Listen on Apple

👉 Grab my FREE emotional regulation toolkit HERE

👉 Check out some of my favorite cozy corner items SHOP MY AMAZON LIST HERE

⸻

Helping your toddler learn emotional regulation isn’t about perfection — it’s about connection.

With a cozy calm down corner, a few intentional tools, and a whole lot of love, you’re giving them a gift that lasts a lifetime. 💛